The Most Awkward Song Lyrics I Can Remember

There are more songs out there than there are people. More than just simple poetry put to music, a good song can stir up deep feelings, happiness, crying, and the whole gamut of human emotion. Others might make you angry, giving you the cause to stand up and do what is right, or inspire you to change something you don't like. Unfortunately, most of them have terrible lyrics that rhyme "head" with "said" and lots of words that sing about absolutely nothing.

Over the short 30 years I have been on this world, so far, I've heard a ton of lyrics that made me feel weird and uncomfortable. Not because they were saying anything disgusting or offensive, but because something was just awkwardly out of place or strange with them. So today I give you the Most Awkward Song Lyrics I Can Remember ever hearing. Sure, there are songs out there with much worse lyrics, but these are the ones that just... well, just read and you'll see what I mean.

• Madonna - I Love New York:
  "I don't like cities but I like New York. Other places make me feel like a dork."

Well, if there is anyone that can accurately describe what a whale penis feels like, I guess it would be Madonna. There are way too many songs about New York, but Madonna's entry is the only one that rhymes New York with dork. Kudos to her. If only she could have done something with it a little more... I dunno, amazing?

• America - Horse With No Name:
  "There were plants and birds and rocks and things."

I actually love this song, but I kind of want a song about the desert to be just a little less lazy. I can find plants bird and rocks and things at the park, in the forest, in my back yard, at the projects, and in every Grand Theft Auto game released yet.  I bet you that if I were to step outside right now, the first things I would notice are plants, birds, rocks and things.